Initiate and Build Relationships to a Successful Life

Developing a strong mental flexibility and discipline is a very personal and delicate process that requires a personal touch, assessment and time. We have found that it is very important and we will share with you keys to developing a strong mindset, an eye to sort out opportunities, how to overcome challenges, and much more. We hope that this will give you a chance to see for yourself how important your state of mind is in any aspect of your life.

Developing a strong mindset will open your minds to explore the art of mind feeding and daily mental exercises. By applying the mental skills that you learn to your everyday life, it will lead you to deeper connections, success, and allow you to Make More and Work Less.

Initiate and Build relationships

When it comes to Making More and Working Less, we need to understand that we cannot do it all ourselves and we need to constantly meet new people in order to impact and add value to others. In real estate it is “location location location” in business and in entrepreneurship is it “relationships relationships relationships”. No matter what it is you do you need connect with another individual at some point.

Reach Out and Build a Team

We all have strong skills and abilities, but there is no way we can do everything ourselves. There isn’t enough time in the day for us to be learning everything to the point where we are competent enough to make the right decisions or stay current enough to make the most informed decision. Why not seek the advice or the expertise of a professional that deals with these situations every day? Experts who need to educate themselves to be relevant in the industry. Professionals who can do the job faster and more creative than you can. Advisers who have the experience to know what to do if a unique situation arises. To Make More and Work Less, we cannot rely on one person. We must build a team of members that we can trust. When you have the team of experts, not only are you able to ensure that your questions or problems are looked after, but it also allows you the time to concentrate on what you do best. 

We are always reminded of the story of Henry Ford the founder of FORD. The following is an excerpt from the book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill [1938].

During the world war, a Chicago newspaper published certain editorials in which, among other statements, Henry Ford was called “an ignorant pacifist.” Mr. Ford objected to the statements and brought suit against the paper for libeling him. When the suit was tried in the courts, the attorneys for the paper pleaded justification, and placed Mr. Ford, himself, on the witness stand, for the purpose of proving to the jury that he was ignorant. The attorneys asked Mr. Ford a great variety of questions, all of them intended to prove, by his own evidence, that, while he might possess considerable specialized knowledge pertaining to the manufacture of automobiles, he was, in the main, ignorant.

Mr. Ford was plied with such questions as the following:

“Who was Benedict Arnold?” and “How many soldiers did the British send over to America to put down the Rebellion of 1776?” In answer to the last question, Mr. Ford replied, “I do not know the exact number of soldiers the British sent over, but I have heard that it was a considerably larger number than ever went back.”

Finally, Mr. Ford became tired of this line of questioning, and in reply to a particularly offensive question, he leaned over, pointed his finger at the lawyer who had asked, and said, “If I should really WANT to answer the foolish question you have just asked, or any of the other questions you have been asking me, let me remind you that I have a row of electric push-buttons on my desk, and by pushing the right button, I can summon to my aid men who can answer ANY question I desire to ask concerning the business to which I am devoting most of my efforts. Now, will you kindly tell me, WHY I should clutter up my mind with general knowledge, for the purpose of being able to answer questions, when I have men around me who can supply any knowledge I require?”

Even the great Henry Ford doesn’t know everything himself! What is important though, is knowing where to seek the knowledge when it is needed. If you want to Make More and Work Less, then you need to build a team so that you get the support and expertise when needed.

What makes a Team? – Relationships. Companies and sport teams have team building events and socials. If you want to have the support and the dynamics of a team you must invest into the individuals that make up that team. You cannot expect your Realtor to think of you when a great deal comes up, if you only call them once a year asking if they have a great deal. Likewise, your coach will not attend to your questions with urgency, if you don’t invest the time to find out what you can do to add value to them. What makes you more important than all your team members’ other clients? Why do they need to care about you and your needs? It all comes down to building the relationship and the bond with your team members so that you get a team of professionals that have common goals and will add value to each other so that everyone’s best interest is on everyone’s mind. It is then that you truly have a team around you.

Build the Relationships

Remember that what you get from each team member is what you put into the relationship. Never expect that your team members will do everything for you. If you do not discuss and plan what you want and what your goals are, you are limiting what your team members can do for you. For instance, a coach is very similar to your doctor. If you always tell your doctor that everything is fine, but you are actually looking for a cure for your sore throat, your doctor wouldn’t know that you were in pain. Similarly, if you don’t share the problems that you are experiencing and are not asking the questions needed to help you reach your goals, then your coach wouldn’t know how to help you.

Once you have found your team members, you can start focusing on building the relationships. Keep in mind that if you find that your chosen team member is not as good as you thought, you can start the whole process again to find someone else more suitable for you.

We have found that the best way to build a relationship with your team members is to add value to them. What is most important to them? How can you help them? By focusing on them first, you will find that it will come back to you tenfold. If you know of potential clients for your power team, always send them their way. You will be surprised to see how much impact you will have if you were to send new clients to your mortgage broker, lawyer, real estate agent etc. consistently.

A great power team is one where you can all benefit each other. In a sense, members of your power team may be your mastermind group. Not only should you build the relationship with the members of your power team but the members within the power team should know each other. For example, your real estate agent and your mortgage broker are two people that will be doing a lot of communications with each other. It will be in your best interest that they work well together. If you have members that you trust, do not be afraid to share your contacts with them and work together. Remember strong relationships will help each other succeed.

As you are one of the core members of the team, be willing to host events or gatherings with all your team members. It was shocking to us when a few of our members told us that we have done things different and that rarely has any of their existing clients opened up their connections to them or added value to them like we have. Have dinner gatherings, get together for movies, and activities. Include them in book collaborations as we have done here, host charity and fundraisers together and help promote each other’s businesses while helping the community. It’s team bonding, and the more the team knows each other and supports each other, the stronger the team gets.

The most important thing to keep in mind with your team members is that no one is more important than another. Whether it is your insurance broker, health coach or investor, each one plays a critical role in helping you reach your goal to Make More and Work Less. You will find that the more value you give your team members, the more you help them Make More and Work Less, the more it will come back to you. Imagine a building being supported by nine pillars. What happens if you take one out? The building’s support will weaken right? The more pillars you take out, the weaker the building support gets until finally it collapses. Just as a building’s support weakens, your team weakens with each missing team member. Team building never ends. The more members you add, the stronger your team becomes, and the faster you will Make More and Work Less.

Initiate the Relationship Environment

Zig Ziglar is very well know for the following quote:

“You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want”

This is something that many entrepreneurs forget when it comes to building relationships and when they connect with others. As important as it is to build a team that supports what you do, it is also important to build relationships in all other areas which will lead to more opportunities and sales. However, the focus should be on adding value and building relationships and less on the sale. If you initiate the focus on building the relationships and adding value it sets the tone of how future interactions to be. We have all experienced being sold to and how we do not appreciate it. However, people are always looking to buy, and just like you they do not want to be sold to. It is no different than asking someone out on a date. You wouldn’t just jump out to someone and say “Hi, want to go out with me?” You would build rapport with them first and see if there is a fit before asking them out on a date. Similarly, building great relationships start with building rapport. Three keys to building relationship are:

  • Key No. 1 – LISTEN more than talk
  • Key No. 2 – How VALUE can be added
  • Key No. 3 – NEVER sell 

LISTEN more than talk

Have you ever noticed that when you are with people who like to talk and after an evening with them they say that they enjoyed the evening a lot and that it was great talking to you even if they did all the talking? Humans by nature like the sound of their own voice. When you genuinely express interest in what someone has to say you would be surprised how much they want to tell you. This is why we were given two ears and one mouth. So that we listen twice as much as we speak. Not do you get to learn more about certain topics that you may have never thought of, but you also will learn a lot more about the person and build a relationship. Before long, you will find that you have something to add with any topic as you will be able to connect to different industries and stories that you’ve heard before with new people that you are meeting.

How VALUE can be Added

In the “value” segment of this series we discussed how important it is to constantly think about how you can add value to the person you are talking to. Is there knowledge that you can offer? Is there someone you know that you can connect them to? Is there a problem that they have that you can help with? Can you help them make something better, faster and more efficient? Constantly having those questions in your mind will allow you to find opportunities to add value. The more value you add the more noticeable you become.

We have been known to have built some really strong strategic relationships one of which is with JT Foxx, the worlds #1 wealth and business coach. With JT we realized that he values loyalty. Therefore, with every opportunity we get, we would attend his events, help his team set up, refer others to attend his events, got to know his staff and partners, picked him up or driven him from/to the airport, given him testimonials, brought him and his team snacks, and supported him on social media. At the writing of this book, we have been closely supporting and been loyal JT for more than 10 years. Surprising to us, JT has presented opportunities to us that he would never offer to other clients and has considered us his close friends. It is because of him that we have been featured on his stages and spoke at his events. This is all because of understanding what he values and adding that value to him.

NEVER sell 

Key No. 3 is never ever sell to the person. The last thing you want to do is to have a potential client or partner label you as a “used car salesman”. We all have this person in mind: someone who is only pushing for the sale, hiding the truth on certain items, not genuine, constantly talking about how great they are and why you need to buy. If those are the people that you stay away from, then those are the people that you definitely do not want to become. The fact is, as long as you follow the first two Keys: Listen intently and look to Add Value you will automatically not sell. You will find that you will answer questions and add information about what you do and know when prompted. The person genuinely wants to hear more about what you have to say.

Social Media Presents Great Access

Lots of people ask “Where do you meet new people”. Well on top of attending events, social media has become a great resource for connecting with people from all over the world. Ask engaging questions, ask for comments, message people and schedule a zoom chat, comment on people’s posts, or simply just message them “Hi, it’s nice to connect with you.” And see what happens. There have been many connections that I have built into strong relationships just simply reaching out and say: “Hi, my name is Fong. I always love connecting with interesting individuals like yourself and would love to have a chat with you to see how I can add value to you.” That simple message has led to relationships in South Africa, Bangladesh, Hong Kong, Singapore, Florida, and many more. Simply reaching out to initiate building a relationship to add value to others have led to clients and/or being interviewed on their podcast shows, which in turn leads to more relationships and opportunities.

To Make More Work Less, initiating and building relationships is vital and the results can be astronomical. Two things that JT Foxx always say are:

“70% of your time should be focused on building relationships.”

“It only takes one person, one deal, and one opportunity to change your life and business forever.”  

Until next time, today is the day to unlock your potential. I’ll see You later.

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